Help Me Decide What Score to Give “Bomb Monkey” [Review… Sort of.]

Game: Bomb Monkey
System: 3DS (eShop)
Developer: Renegade Kid
Release Date: June 27, 2012
Price: $5.00

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It’s games like ‘Bomb Monkey’ that make me wish there wasn’t so much pressure to add a numbered score to game reviews. Admittedly, I hold none of this pressure myself because I have nothing to lose by doing things differently, but in general you’ll see a game like this come along and it’s going to score 6s, 7s, and a few 8s. Maybe even a 9 or two if it’s lucky. You can tell this just by looking at it for three seconds, or from hearing someone describe it.

It’s destined to these scores of “decent-but-not-great” not by value of its production or design, but by virtue of the fact that it’s a casual puzzle game. Like Mario Party or Just Dance, its score doesn’t stand among others in its genre, but rather among those like Zelda or Skyrim; games so grand in scope and lengthy in execution that they deserve the highest industry praises.

‘Bomb Monkey’ neither tries nor needs to be like this. It’s a puzzle game whose objective is simple and if it were anything else would be a worse game for it. Does this mean it’s fair to bound it to scores below 8 or 9? Just because it’s a different kind of game? Should I rate it a 7.5? 7? 6.5? Some might say yes, because it’s not as good as Zelda. Some would say no, because it’s not as good nor worse than Zelda- it’s merely different.

So, let’s say it’s just “different” from these games. What’s a fair way to rate it then? Perhaps against others in its own genre? Okay, let’s try that. ‘Bomb Monkey’ is not quite as good as Tetris or Picross, but it’s certainly better than games like Dr. Mario or Puzzle Quest just by virtue of its charm and smooth production. Okay, so let’s see what all of these games were rated on average…

Tetris: Mostly 8s

Picross: Mostly 8s

Puzzle Quest: Mostly 8s

Dr. Mario: Mostly 8s

Well shit. So it’s better than Puzzle Quest- which got 8s- but worse than Tetris- which also got 8s. Where do I put it then? Do I give it an 8 and move on? In fact, from the looks of it, all puzzle games seem to be getting 7s or 8s unless they’re truly terrible. Going by the industry averages, puzzle games are just… well, they’re just… eights.

There are no 9s.

No 10s.

No 5s or 4s or 1s.

Puzzle games just sort of average out at 8s, whether they’re the best puzzle games of all time like Tetris or Picross, or just pretty good ones like Puzzle Quest. This goes back to the original problem- the “best” a game in this genre can be is an 8. I’m not satisfied with that. If you made the best game in the action adventure genre it would get a 10 from everyone on the planet, but just because some people don’t like puzzle games as much we doom them for 8s? Time to look for a new grading criteria.

Perhaps the most intelligent one I can think of is this idea of “Is there anything bad about it? If not, it gets a 10.”, and yet this idea has its own problems. See, Bomb Monkey literally has nothing wrong with it. It is- and I’m sure of this- a flawless game for what it is. There is next to nothing to complain about- save for the fact that you can’t use the D-pad to select menu items- and as such should receive a 9.9 or a 10 in this system. This doesn’t work either though, because like I said it’s worse than Picross, which would also get a 10 based on this review scale. If the purpose of reviews is to inform people what the best game is, then I can’t use this method of grading or else people will think that Bomb Monkey is as good as Picross.

Let’s try again.

My favorite grading criteria? How much “basic enjoyment” I got out of the game while playing it. How much pure happiness or fun I was having. On this scale, games like Fragile and Wheel of Fortune get 10s, while stuff like Call of Duty- despite being exquisitely well developed- get 6s and 7s. Bomb Monkey would normally rate high, a big part of which comes from the great local multiplayer that only uses one 3DS. Normally, but not today.

You see, my enjoyment of a game is not exclusively tied to how good a game actually is- it also has a lot to do with my health and mood, both of which were not great this past week. If I was going to rate Bomb Monkey on this, I’d unfortunately have to give it a 6. I’m not okay with that though, because had I been in a great mood I may have felt like giving it a 9 or a 10. Hence why this grading criteria sucks too.

So what? What am I supposed to do here? Do I just ignore numbers altogether? What criteria should I rate a game on?

Somebody tell me what they think. Because where it stands now I could give Bomb Monkey a 6, an 8, a 10, or whatever’s in between an 8 and an 8.

Apologies to Renegade Kid for me not reviewing this traditionally nor giving you a score to quote. Here’s something truthful for you to use though: Bomb Monkey is, for all intents and purposes, a nearly flawless puzzle game that relies on simplicity and charm to both draw players in and keep them interested long enough to finish a level. The multiplayer is grand- nay, genius- and something that I hope more developers on handheld devices take note of.

Simple, charming, and fun, Bomb Monkey is everything you need for a great puzzle game, plus a little extra.

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Final Verdict: #/10

Buy if you like: Tetris, Dr. Mario, Bejeweled

Better than: Puzzle Quest, Dr. Mario

Worse than: Picross, Tetris

Worth the cost? Yes. It’s 5 dollars for a good puzzle game that has really fun multiplayer.