Now that Autumn is upon us (or Spring, I guess), it’s time for another batch of new Nintendo releases. Those who were disappointed with last month’s lack of Wii titles will be pleased to see that April is full of new games for the motion-controlled console. That doesn’t mean they’re any good, though, as I had to scrape the bottom of the new releases barrel just to find anything worth writing about this month. Yep, April is definitely going to be a slow month if these games are any indication, but don’t let that deter you from reading any further. No, seriously – keep reading!
Karaoke Revolution Glee: Volume 2 (Wii)
US: April 5
EU: May 13
AU: April 21
Why should you care? Because, unlike me, you’re an avid Gleek and not prone to fits of rage when subjected to horribly autotuned covers of popular songs. Anyway, I was forced to watch my sister play the first volume over the Christmas break, and it seemed to be a decent enough karaoke game. It’s the same basic format as any Karaoke Revolution or Singstar game, just with a license I can’t stand. But I suppose if you’re singing over the subjectively horrible covers of songs like Bad Romance, Like a Virgin and Jessie’s Girl it doesn’t really matter. Karaoke Revolution Glee: Volume 2 will be available either as a stand alone game or bundled with a microphone, and not as DLC like it really should be for only twenty songs.
LEGO Battles: Ninjago (DS)
US: April 12
EU: April 15
AU: April 20
Why should you care? Well, if you (or any of your younger family members) don’t know what a Ninjago is, you probably shouldn’t care. Heck, even I don’t know what a Ninjago is. From the looks of things, it looks like a new line of ninja-themed Lego toys, which I’m assuming are like Bionicles for this generation. But how’s the actual game? Well, the original Lego Battles game, which received mixed reviews when it was released for the Nintendo DS last year, was a fairly simple real-time strategy game, so it looks like Lego Battles: Ninjago should improve on the basic structure of that first attempt. And really, what better way to improve something than just add a bunch of ninjas? Obviously, the cutesy graphics and kiddy license aren’t designed to appeal to hardcore Starcraft veterans, but for younger gamers who are easily excited by the word “Spinjitsu,” this should at least be a decent introduction to the genre.
Conduit 2 (Wii)
US: April 19
EU: April 22
AU: April 21
Why should you care? Because Conduit 2 is the one game that really stands out this month (at least in a good way). With its customisable controls, sharp graphics and excellent online play (by the Wii’s standards), The Conduit really set the bar for how first-person shooters on the Wii should be, so this sequel should have plenty to work with. That said, there have been plenty of other first-person shooters on the Wii since The Conduit came out, like Goldeneye and Call of Duty: Black Ops, so hopefully Conduit 2 can stand out in a crowd and fix some of the issues people had with the first game’s linear levels and moronic enemy AI. The game’s developers, High Voltage, certainly seem to be adding enough bells and whistles to the game – Conduit 2 will support Wii MotionPlus, the Classic Controller Pro and the Headbanger Headset. And though the game’s boxart might make it seem like your generic “gun-wielding-guy-with-a-helmet” sci-fi expedition, the game looks to have plenty of interesting weapons to keep Conduit 2 from being yet another bland shooter. There’s the Aegis Device (which catches enemies’ bullets and fires them back), a Phase Rifle that can shoot through walls and the returning All-Seeing-Eye for scanning things. Online multiplayer was a big draw for the first game, and it’s getting a huge update here with more multiplayer modes with sixteen players online and the addition of different character classes and suit upgrades so if it they ever make a return, Conduit 2 should be a mainstay at Nintendoeverything game nights.
The Kore Gang (Wii)
US: April 19
EU: Already out (at least in Germany)
AU: TBA
Why should you care? Because it’s been a while since there was a new 3D platformer on the Wii worth noticing. Sure, Super Mario Galaxy and de Blob 2 were great, but does anyone remember SPRay and Dewy’s Adventure? New IPs on the Wii always tend to struggle, and there doesn’t seem to be a big market for 3D platformers any more. That said, The Kore Gang was in development for almost a decade (starting life as an Xbox game) so I’m hoping it turns out to be worth the wait. The whole game has a very Psychonauts or Rayman 2 vibe to it, with a very similar visual look, a cast of odd characters, and a plot that involves two kids, a dog, and a robot suit setting out to stop creatures from the Earth’s core “outvading” the planet in an attempt to take over the surface that plays out like a sort of reverse Gurren Lagann (for want of a better reference). In short, it looks to be a nice return to the classic “collectathon” platformers of the late ‘90s and early ‘00s, which is fine by me.
PAL Exclusive (not that we really want it): We Dare (Wii)
US: When hell freezes over
EU: Apparently it’s already out (except in the UK)
AU: April 14
Why should you care? You might have heard a bit about this racy party game over the last month or so when the game’s publisher, Ubisoft, blocked all of the game’s online trailers in the US. Or maybe you heard about the game being cancelled in the UK after a significant public backlash against the game and its only “12+” classification. I could explain how the game works and how it sets the entire video game industry back by about ten years, but it’d be much more entertaining to let the Australian Office of Film and Literature Classification do it for me:
We Dare is a party game for the Nintendo Wii that can be played in single player or multi-player modes. Players begin by customising their appearance and personality and then select a number of mini-games to play, based on their personality types. At the end of each mini-game each player receives a score based on how closely their gameplay matched their chosen personality type… Examples of mini-games include “Love Storm” – where players must hold the Wii remote in between their chests while hugging and swaying in the same direction as the driving rain on the screen; “Quick Escape” – where players have to mimic the movements of their avatar to implicitly release themselves from being chained to a wall and “The More You Dare” – where players are weighed on the Wii balance board then they have to strip off as much of their clothes/adornments as possible in fifteen seconds and then they are weighed again. The player who has “lost” the most weight receives the most points…
This game contains mild sexual references that are discreetly implied and justified by context… At the beginning of each mini-game, text bubbles appear stating information about relationships or physiological detail. Examples include but are not limited to: “many women prefer men who look like their fathers. This is called sexual imprinting” and “married women tend to have affairs when they’re unhappy in their relationship. Married men are just as likely to have affairs when they are happy.”
The OFLC then concluded that the sexual content in We Dare was only “mild” and proceeded to refuse classification to the new Mortal Kombat game instead.
